Life with a new perspective.22, Jan, 2015, by Seema Bhatnagar
Clicked by me at Kathakali show at Thekkady, Kerala, India, during my Jan 2015 Kerala trip.
How about living life with a new perspective? Why to wait for a New Year to begin, why not to seek a new perspective now, every day and every moment and for every little and big situations of life. Is it really so tough, because it involves pushing self to a new plain of thinking?
For many of us, New Year is an occasion for new resolutions, new goals and new desires to achieve but what I feel is, it should happen every day, we must look for opportunities to seek new perspectives of looking at things every day and every moment in every situations of life. Most of our problems in life are due to narrow and hackneyed way of thinking, isn't it more sensible to seek opportunities for renewing our patterns of thinking and rise above the tried and tested ways of thinking.
Doesn’t matter what mindset or perspective you hold on to, life simply goes on. Some of us get stuck with negativity that life has delivered and never feel tired of complaining about torments, while for some brave hearted, no matter what they have faced in life they just move on without cribbing about what they have faced in life or complaining about how others have harmed them.
A New Perspective
"Everything we hear is an opinion, not a fact. Everything we see is a perspective, not the truth." ~ Marcus Aurelius
Yes it is true, you must have faced your weak moments, insults at the hand of others but now think of putting an end to it and try to rise above all these. Think to grow beyond petty things and develop a perspective that nothing should be able to disturb you from inside. No matter what comes to you, whether it is a difficult spouse, irrational n demanding boss, tons of work, doesn't matter what it will be, you will consider that as an opportunity to look inwards and to enhance personal strength to face life with more vigour. Your mental peace is the key to life and at no cost you will let it flicker. You will be fine if somebody misbehave or insult you, because you know that all emotions are temporary and nobody can affect the real power that resides in you.
In majority of situations you feel derailed because you feel hurt, ignored, let down and insulted by others which in a way means that others have remote control of your life and you obey their commands end up disturbing self only. With a deep feeling of being taken for granted or ignored, you simply react to situations and burn self with anger and vengeance. Recall those situations of life where you reacted over petty issue, instead of solving problem it simply produced more heat and created irreparable rifts in relationships.
Some quick examples
From old perspective : My boss is very cruel and yells at me.
From Changed Perspective : My boss has lot to handle and sometimes the pressure of work makes him to lose his temper.
From old perspective : My spouse always criticise me for one thing or another.
From changed perspective : My spouse is an excellent person having different opinions about subjects and people, which sometimes becomes a subject of disagreement between us.
From old perspective : I have lots of work and will not be able to complete in time.
From changed perspective : This is a good opportunity to assess myself for my time management skills.
Several incidents of my life where I reacted without giving a second thought have left a bad taste in my mouth and sometimes I really wish I could go back and correct all those moments but even God can’t help it now. Really, it doesn’t feel good about those moments where I simply reacted and spoiled my relationships which could have otherwise become nurturing for the rest of life. Impulsiveness makes you unpredictable and it is difficult for others to rely on you and hence any relationship cannot flourish in such situation. With my strong determination to handle my interactions with conscious responses than reactions, I have reached to a point where I don’t need to work hard to know what other person expects from me in that particular situation, this helps me by giving enough time to craft my response. Sometimes it feels as if I have forgotten to react and become numb to situations.
My experience tells me that reactions are very harmful and leave damaging trail behind, it is only the thoughtful and sensible responses that get the work done. Not to forget, my daily meditation has a big role to play in this, it helps me to turn inwards and makes me to shut up with my inner nonsense dialogues involving others. It has helped me immensely in developing clarity about situations and people. Personally, I recommend meditation to all my coachees to overcome compulsiveness of reacting to situations.
Oh….it is difficult.
Why it is difficult to develop a new perspective of looking at things and situations because it somewhere pinches your ego and tells you not to leave your identity, a strong urge to be in command. There is an underneath fear of being stripped off and being revealed of your real self. If you are not comfortable with your real self than this will definitely hurt and you would prefer to keep going with those same old and stale reactions to situations. Overcoming this hesitation of accepting self with good and bad gives you real strength to face situations with better sensibility and helps you to connect better with others.
Developing a new perspective about life and situations sounds challenging but life without a challenge is no life. If you live this perspective every day in every situation of life, I bet it will remarkably enhance your inner strength to take life heads on. It doesn’t take much except your constant attention towards situations, which means your hundred percent engagement in your interactions with others.
A happy and joyful life is all about changing personal perspective in every tough situation of life. If you really want happy, cheerful and joyful life then stop reacting and start responding. To start with, overcome your anger, drop your ego and know your strengths and shortcomings, this will help you only by saving your energy and giving you peace inside. This new perspective of stop reacting and giving more importance to others, will literally transform your life and you will not feel life as a burden but a wonderful way to connect and share with others.
Make up your mind and change your perspective NOW.
Ego - The tameable enemy.
The devil inside - Anger - How to overcome?
You are your Habits.